April Fools are Fools, Allways
by Lady Starscream
Summary: G1. sequel to Ey,Macarena. Sometimes, pranksters just don't know when to stop. And when Prowl is on the recieving end, things can only get worse...
1. Chapter 1

"So I have your assurance you will not be late for role call any more, then?" Optimus Prime said, wrapping up his lecture of the blue and muave jet. "Yes,sir. It will not happen again."

Shepaused. "I'll be on time, from now on."

"Alright, Jade. But if you are late even once in the next month, I will have no choice but to let Prowl handle his reprimands of you as he sees fit." the Autobot leader said.

Why did he make it sound like he was saving her from the tactician's wrath? maybe he was. But the long winded lectures Prime could dish out would make even Sunstreaker squirm. Having to sit in one place for forty five minutes was bad enough, but Prime really knew how to word things. Who ever thought being late for rolecall would upset the order of things that much?

Don't get me wrong. Yes, a group has to work in an organized manner in order to be an effective militia.

But really. Being late for one rolecall make the Autobots lose the war. HAH!

The femmeseeker left Prime's office, thankfull to be free of the lecturing. She swore if he talked long enough, he could probably put **Megatron** to sleep. Then again, she decided she'd probably rather have been staring down the gunmetal grey Decepticon leader's arm cannonthan be put to sleep out of BOREDOM.  
She headed for her quarters. "I still have about seven hours till my duty shift starts. plenty of time to go hide out in my room and watch t.v. where **Mr. Spock** can't find me." she thought.

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Meanwhile, on the other side of the base...

Prowl studied a datapad as he entered the empty officer's lounge. Had he not been so logical, he would have sworn the twins had done that...Dancing, as they called it, just to annoy him. He reassured himself with the fact that the Macarena had been permanently banned from the Arc. It was not a pleasant experience to have one's processors short-circuit. Like a cross between a headache, and a complete loss of awareness.

Not that the twins would ever understand it. Or anyone else, unless he tried to explain it. And Prowl would never be able to accurately describe the sensation. With his eyes on his datapad, the Datsun slipped his mug onto the dispenser tray.

"At least I won't have to see their faces for another fourty five minutes, twelve seconds, and twenty one nanoclicks." that was when the duo were supposed to report in from patrol. His processors still on the events of the previous day, the Black and white Datsun cop car took a sip of his nice warm energon.

"Pfffsfff! what the?"

Prowl spat out the disgustingly bitter liquid and glared down at his mug, then at the dispenser.

Where the variety of liquid was labeled had been marked out, and written under it in black Marks-a-Lot were the words "Prune Juice"  
The tactician narrowed his eyes at the neatly printed writing.

"We shall see who the 'prune' is." he said as he carefully peeled off the label.

_"Once analyzed, the handwriting could be the key to finding out who did this. Handwriting is as unique as the personality."_ he thought.

Unfortunately, the only other drinkable liquid stored in the dispenser was oil-based, and wouldn't providehim with nearlyenergy for the day. This meant the policecar would have to go to the regular cafateria/rec room for his daily energon.

The rec room door slid open with a muffled swish. Prowl silently let out a sigh of relief there was no music. He quickly glanced around the corner before walking in like nothing was wrong. He was not going to let himself be blindsided by any more childish foolishness. The place was, in fact, empty for the most part. Except for Jazz and the twins, Sideswipe and Sunstreaker,sitting at a table in one corner, talking quietly amongst themselves. The tactician narrowed his optics at them suspiciously.

"Plotting, no doubt." he could've sworn it was something red alert would say if he were the target, but still a logical assumption.

"Don't you three have someplace to be?" he asked.

Jade leaned out from behind the trio.

"What am I, Mrs. invisibility now?" the seekerjet said.

Sideswipe laughed. "I think the Macarena messed with his processors more than we thought it did"

"That, or it was the sight of your ugly skidplate dancing to it." Sunstreaker snorted.

Jazz just grinned. "Now guys, be nice. Prowl just doesn't like music. That's all"

Sunstreaker mumbled "He woudn't know it if it bit him on the chevron"

"what's wrong, isn't the dispenser in the officer's lounge working?" Jade asked, with genuine concern.

Prowl turned around, mug in hand.

"no. It seems someone has reprogrammed it to instead dispense . . . Prune juice"

Jade suddenly had a coughing fit.

Sideswipe and Sunstreaker exchanged knowing glances. "Gee, who would do something so mean?" Sideswipe said coyly.

"I have not discovered that yet. But I am certain that when I do, those responsible will regret it.

"Yeah, well we've been accounted for. You can check where we both were last night." Sideswipe added.

Down the hall, Ironhide's voice could be heard reverberating off the hallway walls.

"SIDESIPE!"

Jazz started to get up. "I gotta go, guys." Ironhide stomped throught the door as the Porsche left his seat.

"I'm gonna be late for m'duty shift." he mumbled apologetically as he hurried past Ironhide and out the door.

"I didn't do it. I swear!" the red twin held up both hands in a surrendering motion.

"What the heck is this stuff, anyway?" the boxy red mech demanded.

"Prune Juice" prowlreplied emotionlessly. The southern-accented mech turned on the tactician.

"And just how would you know! Somebody ripped the label offa the dispenser"

Prowl looked sheepish. He'd forgotten about that.

"I confiscated it in order to analyze the handwriting." the black and white Datsun looked over at the seeker and lambos, searching for any signs of suprise, or any body language that might reveal the culprit.

There were none.

"Well next tahm let sumbuddy know bifor ya go yankin the labels offa things." the red van drawled annoyedly. He fetched a cube from the dispenser and took an experimental sip.

I'll let ratchet know so he can repair it.". Prowl replied. He caught a quick flash of suprise in the femmeseeker's optics, but it only lasted a milisecond"

"Gotcha."

Ironhide nodded, and made his exit, heading for some other part of the ship. Jade stood up from the table.

"I'd better go. I don't want to be late for my patrol." she tossed her empty cube in the disposal unit.

"Yes, you don't want to be late." Prowl parroted, knowing her patrol didn't start for another half an hour. Jade caught his tone, and pretended not to hear as she walked out. Once down the hall and out of sight of the rec room's occupants, she quickly detoured down a side hall to keep from being seen.

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Optimus Prime and Bumblebee were in the control room when Prowl walked in.

"Hey, Prowl." Bumblebee said cheerily. "Any luck finding the resident prankster"

"Prankster?" the Autobot leader glanced at his second in command with a sinking feeling the twins were at it again.

"I wasn't informed of any pranksters"

"I hadn't gotten the chance to notify you yet, Prime." the police car replied.

"Do you think the twins are behind it?" the red and blue semi queried, **knowing** they were. It was just a matter of time untill his second-in-command tactician could prove it. Then he would come complaining to Prime, who would have to hand out lectures to the both of them, like usual. Sometimes he wished the two Lamborginis would just grow up and act like adult,s like the rest of the Arc's inhabitants.

"I haven't analyzed all the evidence yet." Prowl responded.

He wasn't suprised.

"Anyone could be behind it." he glanced suspiciously at Bumblebee, who glared back as much as any hip-height sunflowercolored minibot could.

"Hey, don't look at me. I'm not that kind of mech"

the Volkswagen beetle transformed and drove out of the room.

Around the corner, he transformed back, leaning in to listen for anything Prowl didn't want him to hear. Then retreated down the hall toward his destination.

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Later that night, in the shadows of a dimly lit room, the yellow minibot stepped in, quietly closing the door behind him. The room might have been quite large to a human or minibot, but average size for a regular transformer. The balcony along the back wall was barely visible in the dim light, except for the lamp on the table at one end of the couch, which had it's back against the balcony railing.

"Well, what did he say?" a female voice queried from the darkness.

"Uh, I don't even know why you're pulling me into this." the yellow minibot shifted his weight nervously from one foot to the other.

"Do you want me to tell Jazz who stole all his music and replaced it with the world's most annoying pop music and boybands"

"Well, no."

he paused, then perked up slightly as he said:

But you don't want me telling Prowl how replaced the energon in the dispenser with Prune juice, do you"

"Touche' " The owner of the voice turned the lights over the balcony on to their normal level, and turned so she was draped over the back of the couch. "Except I wasn't the one who did it." the strawberry-blonde female grinned.

"well, who did, then?" Bumblebee queried.

Jade huffed, then said half-jokingly "like I'd tell the mech that just threatened to turn me in?"

"Yeah, right."

She turned around and sat facing forward for a second, then got up and turned back around to re-drape herself over the railing. "So what did he say?"

the minispy paused for a second, and considered witholding his information to find out just who reprogrammed the dispenser unit. But decided not to.

He shrugged. "He thinks it's the twins"

The blue-eyed strawberry blonde grinned mischeviously. "Good . . . Let him"

She bounced down the balcony steps and up to the yellow minispy. "you're not going to tell Jazz, are you?" he shifted his weight from one foot to the other again.

"I mean, Jazz woudn't hurt a fly. It's just ...his music is so... annoying"

"No. But, if you want to keep him from finding it, I woudn't suggest hiding it in the storage bay." she replied.

"But.. how did you..."

"I was storing some stuff." she said simply. What she was storing, though, was another story.  
"Besides, no sense in letting music go to waste. He'll never find it here." she reassured.

Bumblebee didn't look convinced. If she wanted to, she could turn him in, but he knew for certain she had rigged the dispenser.

"_They never suspect the cute one, do they?"_ Bumblebee knew he'd be the last suspect for that. No matter how crossly Prowl looked at him. And Jade had the only evidence, implicating the femme if they found it in her quarters.

Yeah, parting Jazz and his misic was a major no-no,considering the Porsche spent all his spare time listening to it, and couldn't stand to be without music in some form or the other. But the vision of Jazz and the Lamborgini twins doing the Macarena entered the yellow volkswagen's processor, and got hastily shoved away. Bumblebee instead wondered just how loopy the the poor black and white would get without his music to listen to...

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The yellow minibot hurried out of the jet's quarters and down the hall, not even noticing the black and white mech approaching the room from down the hall behind him.

The human picked up a cd case from the coffe table. "well, since the joke's gone this far, no sense in letting good music go to waste."

Jade got up and put the cd in the stereo, turning the volume down so it couldn't be heard out in the hall.

"I wonder just how dingy the Porsche will get without his music." she snickered.

"I dunno Jade, Why don't you ask him." a voice sounded from the doorway.

The black and white saboteur was leaning casually against the side of the open doorway.

"bus-ted"

"It wasn't me, I swear"

"Uh-huh. Jus like the twins jury rigged the dispenser in da officer's lounge?" Jazz walked over to the balcony.

"they did! really!" she nodded enthusuastically, strawberry-blonde hair bouncing.

"One, the handwriting was too small ta be a regular-sized Autobot. Two, it was written in black marker. And three..." he rested his chin on his arms folded over the balcony railing with, giving her a pleading look.

"Can I have my music back, please"

She eyed him for a minute. "Just don't tell Bumblebee whre you found it, that's all I ask"

now it was the Porsche's turn to be suprised.

"Bumblebee! but why? wha'd I ever do ta him"

The human shrugged. "I guess Prowl's allways blaming the pranks around here on the twins, and he thought he'd have a chuckle or two.

"Yeah, but...waitaminute." the saboteur's blue visor darkened for a second, and he pegged her with a suspicious look.

Long enough to make her uneasy.

"Jade"

"Yeah Jazz"

"How'd you get my music"

"We-I-uh"

oh slag.

"look, I admit I might have given him some...ideas." she admitted.

"But I wasn't directly involved in it." she quickly added.

She went and retrieved the box of the cds from the cabinet next to the stereo.

The "We - I" and the pause said loudly the human was hiding something. And the black and white Autobot was going to find out what.

"Ya know I'm gonna have to report this to Prowl"

her shoulders fell slightly at the thought.

"please don't"

"Why, it wasn't you"

"Prowl is gonna think I was involved anyway"

She knew although Jazz had his moments of immaturity and even the occasional joke, he was still duty-bound enough to report the activity if Prime and Prowl were demanding answers.

"I still have your music." she was half-joking.

"I can tell Prowl you were da mastermind." he was, too.

"You wouldn't dare." She looked up at him grinning, but he wasn't.

"Maybe I was wrong about him being sardonic. Well, I can't blame him for getting cranky without his music." she thought.

she stifled a snicker.

The young woman hefted the box and set it on the couch where he could reach it.

"Seriously, please don't tell him. Bumblebee will tell Prowl I was in on it to save himself"

The Saboteur knew from experience that Bumblebee would never lie. Especially to save himself by passing the blame to one of his comrades. One of the things Bumblebee was known for was his honesty.

"So it was 'bee, then."

" mm-hmm" the young woman nodded enthusiastically from the stereo

"so where'd he get the idea for prune juice. From you"

"huh?" her head shot up.

The Porsche grinned good-naturedly.

"I shoulda suspected him. Dat writing coulda been done by a minispy. And it was too neat ta be yours"

He carefully watched her reaction. Body language speaks volumes, so to say. And the emotions could be hidden quickly, but not before he would see them. First there was suprise, then a little pride at the mention of neat handwriting.

"It wasn't him. I told you"

"And how do you know that for sure?" He knew she could easily give herself away with her answer. Or accuse Bumblebee, which meant Jazz would go have a chat with him, and she knew he'd give her up. Either way, if she was in on it, her respose would give her away.

she paused. "I don't"

She took the cd out, utting it back in it's case. She dropped the cd into the box on the couch with the others, then looked up at him, face pleading.

"Please don't tell Prowl. It was all just in good humor. I know he's just looking for a reason to get back at me"

"for what? You didn't do nothin'."

"I was late for rolecall several times. Did you forget?"

He shrugged. "I don't see why yer worried, though." He grabbed the box and turned to walk away.

"Jazz." he glanced back.

"I don't want to give him any reasons to put me on monitor duty or something. Please"

"Well.." he gave the now-shut door a glance.

" Alright, I won't tell Prowl you're plannin any pranks on him."

Jade breathed a sigh of relief. Hey waitaminute!

the Black and white saboteur grinned deviously. "If you let me know what's goin on..."


	2. Chapter 2

Okay, yeah, this iskind ofa fillerbit I wrote to keep the story going, but has a few more clues as to who did what pranks.Sorry it took so long. My plotbunnies all ran away and hid from me. (sniffle) they don't like me anymore. (wipes a tear) AHEM... okay. Hopefully I'll getmy chaptersup sooner this time. I've got four writing projects going right now, (all TF fanfiction), so it's kinda slow going. But I'll try to do better on getting my chapters posted.

"Well?" the yellow Lamborgini glared down at the yellow minispy expectantly.

"Jade has the music." Bumblebee replied. "But she thinks I did it now." he added quickly.

"See." the red Lamborgini turned to his red twin. "I told you it would work."

Sideswipe grinned micheviously. Bumblebee was about to be offended, when Sideswipe added "If they find the music in her quarters, they'll think it was her"

"It was her, dumbass." the yellow lambo twin said

"Oh, yeah, right." the red twin tried to look innocent, but failed completely.

"So, you're not going to tell Prowl, are you?" the Volkswagen pleaded.

"Why? everyone thinks Jade rigged that dispenser." Sideswipe responded.

Bumblebee looked relieved.

"Unless I tell them otherwise"

"aww.."

"You know what you have to do if you want us to keep our end of the bargain."

the Lamborgini twins folded their arms over their chestplates and regaurded the minispy with determined looks.  
He looked up at them, hesitantly. "Oh, alright." he said.

"But don't expect me to like it"

"Good. Now be a good little 'bot and run off now." Sunstreaker said patronizingly.

"What have I gotten myself into now?" the yellow volkswagen thought as he left their quarters.

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Optimus Prime found Prowl in the security office, scrutinizing a security camera video from the night before the dispenser incident.

"Have you had any success in finding out who may have played those pranks, Prowl"

The tactician paused the video, and scrutinized a few more frames.

"No. Unfortunately, the cameras in the officer's lounge are pointed more towards the door. If anyone came through that door, however, they would have been seen by the camera."

he checked again.

"Unless..."

he magnified the portion of film closest to the dispenser.

"The camera got their shadow." the tactician allowed himself a little smirk.

"If the person responsible for this either ducked under the camera as they came through the door, or were too short for the camera to see..." He increased the resolution on the shadow.

"They would still have to have enough technical knowledge to cut off the energon flow from the main storage tank, and insert a line to whatever container was holding that... liquid without the two mixing." he added. The tactician pressed a final button, and announced: "And I know who did it."

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"It was a prank, okay!" the muave and blue jet threw her hands in the air in an exasperated motion.

"I admit I stole Jazz's music. It was revenge for last year's joke. I didn't have time to get him back because of that big Decepticon attack."

"That's not what I'm talking about, Jade." Prowl kept his arms folded over his chest, like a parent reprimanding a child.

"Why did you reprogram the dispenser in the officer's lounge? was it revenge, because I reprimanded you for being late for rolecall?"

Jade looked from Prowl to Prime, to Prowl, and perked an optic ridge.

"I didn't do it." she said, hiding amusement. Neither Prowl nor Prime looked amused, however. Or like they believed her one little bit.

"Then why do I have security camera footage that has you on it?" Prowl replied evenly. Jadebecame a little more nervousand lessamused.

"I dunno." she paused, looking away.

"I don't believe you anyway. Let me see it." she added.

Prime pegged the seekerjet with a stern look. "Not until you tell us why you pulled that prank on Prowl."

Jade glanced at him, then looked defeated.

"All right, look. I... sometimes sneak into the officer's lounge for a cube or two. Then I go back to the regular lounge so no one suspects it." She admitted guiltily.

"That would explain the mysterious dissapearance of energon from the lounge dispenser." Prowl thought.

"Why?"

"Because it's a slightly higher grade than the regular cafeteria stuff. It lasts longer, and I can fly better on it. It's like gasoline vs. jet fuel. And being a jet, I don't take the regular fuels very well." she said.

"You should have told someone." Prowl put in. "I did. I told Ratchet about it, and he told me to deal with it." she scowled. "he was supposed to help me install a fuel-conversion and filtration unit in my jet form, till somebody called him to fix their **Prune Juice Problem**." the femmeseeker gave Prowl an icy look.

"So that was why she looked suprised that day." the tactician thought.

"But that still doesn't explain how your shadow got onto the security video." Prime put in. Jade shrugged.

"Maybe whoever did it knew where the camera was. It was pointed at the door, right? and I can't get around the camera because of my wings sticking out. Not to mention my height. I dunno, maybe it wasn't wings you saw, maybe...doorwings, or something. Then again, I can't guess. I didn't see your alledged 'video'. she cast another glance at the tactician.

"You should have told Prowl when he mentioned calling Ratchet on that day." Prime commented.

"And why didn't he say something when I contacted him?" Prowl put in.

"I told him to keep quiet about it. I didn't think it was that big of a deal. And you guys were upset at me anyway. I didn't want to seem like a big deal or anything."

Prime didn't look convinced. "You realize you should have said something, no matter how petty it may seem. I'm sure Wheeljack could have fixed the dispenser."

the muave and blue jet looked slightly embarrased at this.

"I know"

Prowl gave the jet a look.

"Did you enter the officer's lounge at any point in time that morning?"

"No."

"Where were you, then."

"In my quarters recharging, then in the regular cafeteria."

"And can you prove your whereabouts between 11pm and 6 a.m.?"

"No. I was asleep." Jade wished she still was, too.

Prowl and the Autobot leader exchanged a glance.

"You realise that taking unauthorised fuel rations from the officer's lounge constitutes theft, correct?."

"Yes but I-"

"You also neglected to let Optimus Prime or myself know so that the problem could be corrected, instead of taking matters into your own hands."

Jade wondered how she could get into trouble without even trying.

"Yes, sir." she said defeatedly.

"You are hereby assigned to monitor duty for the next three nights." Prowl said.

She could've sworn Prime gave the tactician a suprised glance out of the corner of his optics. It was bad enough to have the nightshift monitor duty, but with Red Alert? He was supposed to have monitor duty during the night this week, also. Jade just looked balefully at the two from under her rectangular chevron. She silently thanked her lucky stars she could actually get along with the neurotic red-and-white. That or block his jabbering out completely. S

He also remembered her conversation with Jazz, and silently swore unholy vengence on him for giving Prowl the very idea she had hinted he would during their conversation.

"So much for an alliance, huh? just wait." she thought...

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Well, hope it was interesting. It took me three hours of staring at a blank computer to think it up. (boy, that really says something about my imagination, doesn't it?)

Anyhoo, I'd love to hear your opinions on who's behind the pranks. That and I **love** hearing reviews. Flames will be used to taunt Inferno and Red Alert. (Ha Ha)


	3. Chapter 3

well, here goes another round. I'm almost finished. So you won't have to wait much longer to find out who did what. Believe me, I think you're going to be suprised... (heh heh heh) Oh, and I forgot to let you know, this is the morning after the last two chapters. Just so you know. If I messed up on anything, let me know, K?

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Prowl glared at his reflection in the mirror. His perfect black-and-white paint job had been marred by hundreds of small red dots. Not tiny, but not large enough to be called polka-dots, either. Those infernal twins were behind this! he just knew it!

He remembered the time Spike had gotten the measles. But he was a human.

Cybertronians couldn't catch human sicknesses, could they?

he scowled at the thought of having to see Ratchet. But at least the medic could remove whatever paint (ahem) had been so gleefully applied to the tactician's armor. He hoped.

Unless it wasn't paint.

The Datsun hurried towards the med-bay, thankfull it was still to early to see anyone else roaming the Arc's halls. Except a certain Porsche, who was returning from night patrol.

"Hey, Prowl, what's the hurry?" Jazz jogged up behind the Datsun, gleeful as usual.

"Not now, Jazz." Prowl half-growled.

"What's wrong? wake up on the wrong side of the recharge berth?" the saboteur teased as he caught up to the now black-white-and-red tactician, and saw the spots.

"Oh"

Prowl scowled. "As much as I can withstand the occasional joke, I believe this has gone too far"

Jazz grinned. "You'll be okay. You should go see Ratchet though. I remember the time Spike got the spots"

"I know." Prowl said flatly.

"Okay. Well, see you later then." he started down the hall.

"Good luck with the spots." Jazz called over his shoulder. Prowl stopped and shot the retreating saboteur a look. Just what did he mean by that? did he know something Prowl didn't?

He could just hear the Porsche chuckling to himself over it as he walked down the hall...

Wheeljack stalked into the control room, obviously upset. "Prime, Someone broke into my workshop last night and stole my experimental paint." the Autobot leader and Ironhide exchanged a glance.

"That paint wasn't finished. The chemical composition is highly unstable. The inventor waved his arms about, as if to accent his point. "

another glance between the two mechs.

"Is it dangerous." Prime asked.

"No. It just has a tendency to dissapear after being applied. It's still experimental." the inventor explained.

"I think I know what happened to your paint, Wheeljack." Prime motioned for the inventor to follow him, and headed for the repairbay.

"It's only paint, Prowl. You'll be fine." Ratchet reassured, trying to hide a chuckle.

"I feel sorry for whoever did this, though."

"Trust me, whoever did this will regret it." Prowl replied flatly.

The white and red medic blinked at the tactician's enthusiasm. This was obviously not the first prank that had been played out on the Datsun, since the macarena incident. And it was obviously starting to bother the tactician that he couldn't figure out who was behind them.

"And the first ones I am going to ask about this is a certain pair of Lamborginis."

The repairbay door swished open and Prime walked in, followed by a slightly peeved Wheeljack. But any anger wheeljack may have had evaporated when he saw the spots.

"Oh, so that's where it went." his light-panels flashed blue in amusement. Ratchet and Prowl both gave the inventor a look.

"It's only paint, Prowl. It's one of my projects I've been working on. Don't worry, thought. It's harmless. I'm positive."

Prowl and Ratchet echanged a glance. Most of Wheeljack's inventions were supposed to be harmless. Then again, how harmfull could _paint_ be? Prowl decided not to think about it. He could allready feel a headache starting.

"It'll fade after about an hour or so. That's the trouble I've been having with it." he repeated.

"The question is, how did someone get into my workshop and steal it. And why?"

Prowl sourly replied: "Because someone wanted easy access to paint they could use to do this." he motioned himself.

"And security is the lowest around your workshop." the words had no sooner left the tacticians vocalizer when he realized the security cameras around the base could, once again, be an answer to who did it...

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"We did what?" Sideswipe exclaimed.

"You heard me. Breaking and entering, petty theft, and assaulting an officer."

"HAH! you're dreaming. I don't know how repainting someone in their recharge qualifies as assault." Sunstreaker pasted his hands on his hips offendedly.

"And we didn't even know about Wheejack's paint. Why don't you go ask someone else. Like Bumblebee, or something."

Sideswipe shot him a look, but the yellow Lamborgini continued to glare. Prowl mirrored the glare.

"What does Bumblebee have to do with this?"

"I dunno." Sunstreaker looked confident he was getting out of this.

"He's small, yaknow, he might be able to get around the cameras or something."

"I _will_ be watching you two. I _know_ it was you, I just have to prove it."Prowl said. "Oooh, is the abosutely logical tactician jumping to conclusions?"

Sideswipe knew he should have kept his mouth shut.

"I also now have proof it was you two who rigged the dispenser in the officer's lounge." he announced. "You will be joining Hound on patrol route three in the southern sector for patrol today instead of your usual route."

"But it's all muddy out there!" Sunstreaker whined.

"Yes, I know."

It was a gamble, but it might prod the duo into admitting they did do the prank. Or saying who really did the prank, if they knew. Instead, both Lamborginis folded their arms in contempt. Prowl narrowed his optics slightly in suspicion, but did an about-face and strode away.

"I TOLD you to keep your mouth shut!" Sunstreaker growled at his twin.

"Do you know what all that mud is gonna do to my finish?" he half-wailed.

"Don't worry, Sunny. We'll make sure someone gets theirs back for this." Sideswipe replied, an evil grin spreading over his cherubic features.

"Sideswipe I don't think you understand. It was your stupid idea to start a pranking contest that got us into this in the first place." Sunstreaker growled.

In the storage room next door, Prowl smirked as he listened to their arguing. _Now_ things were coming together the way that they should. And all he had to do now was go speak to Bumblebee and ask a few _questions,_ and he betthe minispywouldtell himeverything he needed to know, including the twins's pranks...


	4. Chapter 4

okay, so I was going to wait for the next chapter to post theses two scenes, but then I decided you'd allready know who did what pranks by then, so It would just be redundant to wait. The first one is the dispenser prank, and the second one is the Prowl-polka dot prank. Enjoy:-)

1.

The shadow crept stealthily down the corridor, making barely a sound. the figure rounded a corner and paused, concealing itself in a shadow. Then tiptoed onward. Left...right...left...right.

"Shhh." The person cautioned themself silently as they continued onward. Finally, the shadow had reached it's destination. Slowly, the figure lowered themself almost to the floor, and glided under the view of the videocamera, making sure it wasn't plainly in view. Snickering, the figure glanced at the camera and waved, knowing it wouldn't wouldn't see them. With a quick glance at the door, the mech got to work, pulling a small toolkit out of subspace.

Carefully, the shadow-concealed culpritopeneda small panel the dispenser unit, which revealedthe maincontrol panel. The prankster pulled out one of the tools and fiddled around with the control panel for a second.

"Too bad I don't have the access code. That would make this a lot easier." the mech thought. He quickly clamped the tube leading to the dispenser and sliced through it, making sure no energon would leak out from the storage unit, either. "This is too easy." the mech chuckled, too quiet for the camera's microphone to hear.

The magnetic wrench slipped, hitting a circuit.

"CRACK!"

The bright blue spark and loud noise made the mech jump, sending the magnowrench flying.

"Scrag!" the figure hissed, hoping nobody had heard outside of the room. Slowly, the figure ducked under the camera's view, reaching for the magnowrench. "Come on, man. You're s'posed ta be the king'a sneak." the figure chided. Grabbing up the wrench, the figure finished installing the tiny container in the dispenser, and sealed the tube shut. "Now for the final touch. Grinning, the figure produced a small slip of paper.

"Never leave your handwriting where it can be easily found and replicated."

the figure chuckled, securing the paper in place. Themech quietly closed the panels and crept out of the room, avoiding the cameras with the same ease as before.  
"Round two goes to 'da king." he grinned, and sauntered nonchalantly down the hall to wait for the result.

---------------------------------------------------

2. ( Two nights later, theliving quarters area of the ship)

"Thunk, thunk,scrrreee"

the ventilation duct groaned under the weight of it's occupant. The small mech shifted his weight, muttering curses under his vocaliser. He slowed his crawling at the next intersection, reminding himself to be extra quiet. This part of the square ventilation duct ran over the quarters next to Prowl's.

And needless to say, Prowl's 'neighbor' had hearing so sensitive, he could probably hear a pin drop at a rock concert. The small mech shuffled a little further in the cramped space, idly wondering how a mech could listen to music at audio-splitting lodness, and still be able to hear so well.

"No, mind on the job at hand." he silently reprimanded himself.

"Pay attention to what you're doing"

his kneegaurd scraped a little too loudly just as he thought that, making a soft metal-on-metal screech. He froze. Even if it _had_ been a soft sound, he realized he was right beside the open grating, making it twice as likely to be heard. He swore again mentally, making no more sound than a soft hiss of aggrivation.

He glanced out and down into the quarters below. The t.v. was on, chattering away with some late-night talk show. Jay Leno, or something like that. the black-and white Porsche lounging on the couch glanced up, canted a grin, and turned up the volume on the T.V. slightly, as though he hadn't seen or heard a thing.

The shadow-shrouded figure in the duct breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe he hadn't heard? maybe the grin had been for something funny on the tv? either way, the small bot resolved himself to be as quiet as possible.

crreeeakkk... "scrag!"

creeaaaugggrrrggg..grrrng

"uh-oh."

The mech braced himself against the sides of the duct, waiting for the bottom of it to give way.

"Well, so much for being quiet." he said despairingly.

EEuRRgh..tink-tink-tink

He could just hear the rivets popping loose around him. He quickly changed his mind, and decided to move faster, rather than wait for it to give way.

scrr-wsh, scree-shwisht-shwisht.

the creaking had finally stopped. He had escaped certain demise!

He paused long enough to let his racing fuel pump calm down, to it's normal pace, beforecontinuing to shuffle toward his destination. He carefully peered out into the darkened room, finding it's only occupant was still asleep. Thank goodness.

He carefully reached through the grating and undid the screws, catching them before they could fall on the person below. He removed the duct covering, and cringed when a clump of dust came loose and fell straight towards the sleeping form below. The grey foofy mass barely missed the tactician's face, landing softly on the floor next to the recharge berth.

The little car mentally thanked his lucky stars.

He jumped, deftly missing the recharge berth, and landed with a soft thump beside it. He looked up at the open ductway, wondering how on Earth he was going to get that grating-cover-thing back on without getting caught.

-He hadn't thought of that.

he padded almost silently to the door and tapped the keypad. The door slid open with a muffled swish, flooding the room with light from the hallway. Thankfully, Prowl was still asleep, curled up with his back to the door.

The two figures standing outside Prowl's door, however, looked like they were very much awake.

"Hello, Bumblebee. We've been waiting for you." the one on the left said...

-------------------------------------------------------------

(heh, you'll have to wait till the next chapter for the rest of this one. My plotbunnies ran off for the night, which basically means my imagination fell asleep. That and I wanted a cheap excuse to make a kinda-cliffhanger)


	5. Chapter 5

YAY! another chapter!

okay, so I've run out of things to put up here.

that's right. nothing. Oh yeah, except a thank you to my hubby for the kick-in-the-pants neccesary to get me writing on this fic again. Sometimes I think I put things off too much...

usually I'd give you some sort of good excuse, like I got really busy with something-or-another, but I ran out of excuses this past weekend while trying to avoid my mother-in-law... (snicker)

Oh well, here it is. I hope it's funnier than what you've been getting. I'm trying.

no, really.

Really, I am.

no, seriously

why are you laughing at me?

o.0

oh well, here it is anyway. (pouts)

Maybe I'll go bother the Decepticons for a while... (wanders away mumbling)

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

1:45 am.

The security office was so quiet you could hear a pin drop. Red Alert had trailed off from his usual chattering about security, and such-and-such. The muave-and-blue seekerjet seated beside him hadn't been paying attention anyway. Jade had dozed off, and was happily catnapping away, dreaming about flying, or getting revenge on a certain black and white Porsche for suggesting she be put on security monitor duty...

The shadow behind them stealthily crept along the bottom of the wall. The security chief glanced over, but only saw shadows. But he sensed something; He narrowed his optics and looked more carefully. His intuition nagged at him there was someone there, even though he couldn't see them. But it wasn't a positive feeling, like the feeling his sensors got when there was a Decepticon nearby. Maybe it had been his imagination?

or possibly a mech trying to make him the target of one of their pranks? he had heard about the disorganized _mayhem_ that had been happening around the Arc lately. And he planned on _not_ being on the recieving end of anyone's idea of a 'joke'.

"I know you're there."

he scanned the room quickly.

"Come out now, or else." he commanded, reaching for his gun.

Jade woke up, and glanced around the room. "I don't think there's anyone there, Red"

"I thought I sensed someone, Jade"

the white and red car turned back to the console and pressed a couple buttons. Whoever was in here with them wasn't getting out now. Red alert had locked the door. All they had to do was wait. And even if he was wrong, it wouldn't hurt just to be precautious.

---------------------------------------------------------

2:45 am.

"Hey Red, can I go get some energon so I can stay awake?" the jet asked sleepily.

"The security of the arc is more important than even recharging, Jade. I would suggest you find other ways to stay awake."

"and" he added, switching to another camera on the screen

"I believe that is why you were assigned monitor duty in the first place"

"But if I don't get some energy soon, I'm gonna fall asleep. You wouldn't want me to _neglect my duties_ just because I can't stay awake, would you?" Jade argued.

"no, I suppose not"

Jade smiled sleepily, and started to get up

"Hurry, Jade"

"I will"

"And remember, I'm watching you" "I know, I know" the jet mumbled her way to the door.

the jetwasn't the only thing he was watching, though. As soon as the security office door slid open, Red Alert was sure he'd see that elusive shadow from earlier flit through it.

nope.

drat.

Jade yawned and half-stumbled down the hallway, Red Alert watching from the cameras.

when the jet returned, she flopped into her chair and offered a cube to the security chief.

"No thank you." he waved her off.

"I'll get my own later. Besides, I don't know if you could have done something to it first. For all I know, _you_ could be one of the Arc's pranksters."

Jade opened her mouth to make a wisecrack about '_Aww, do you want me to take a sip of it first for you to make sure it's not poisoned?' _but decided against it.

She still had six hours of her shift left, and didn't want to spend it listening to RedAlert's constant complaining just because she'd smarted off to him. She just shrugged, and set the cube on the console where she could reach it easily, and went back to watching the cameras.

------------------------------------------------

Fifteen minutes later...

"Hey Red"

the red-and-white have a heaving sigh. _'now what'_ he thought. but only said

"yes?"

"Doesn't that make your optics hurt?"

"what?"

"Well, you've been staring at that security monitor for the past hour"

"that's my job." he returned flatly.

His optics stayed frozen to the screen, it's light giving them a sort of frozen-over glassy look.

Jade wondered if his optics would spontaneously shut themselves down from all the torcher, and stifled a snicker.

"Red?"

"yes, Jade"

"You haven't blinked in, like, five minutes"

"I do not need to 'blink', like the humans do"

"ohh-kaay.."

Jade turned back to her monitor. Was that a shadow she saw moving reflected in the screen?

Okay, now_**she** _needed to quit staring at the screen for so long. She blinked several times to rid her optics of the screen's afterimages.

"Well, if he wants to stare at that screen, he won't notice if I stare at the insides of my optic lenscovers."

Jade settled down into her seat, blissfully unaware of the firecrackers in a neat little row, and the mayhem about to unfold...

she canted a glance sideways out of the corner of her optic.

Yep, still staring.

The seekerjet turned off her optics and started to doze off...

CRACKCRACKCRACKCRACKCRACK **BLAM! BLAM! BLAM!BLAM! BLAM!**

"AAIIEEEE!" the jet flew out of her seat.

-straight up.

Red Alert was standing off to one side, smoking pistol in hand, and a neat row of holes in the opposite wall.

"Bored much." the jet said flatly.

Red Alert glanced around frantically. "We're not alone in here." he said, voice tight.

"Uh, huh. And you shouldn't have been staring at that screen so long"

Red Alert was so busy doing his best chiuauwa-at-a-cat-show impression to make any kind of comeback, though.

"Blink, Red"

-snicker

"Huh? where'd that come from?"

Jade turned in a circle, but found nothing. Red Alert went hand-over-hand along the wall, and Jade followed suit starting at the adjacent wall going towards him. Still nothing. If that shadow had moved, it meant someone was in here with them.

But who? there were only two people it could be.

One could create illusions, and the other could become completely invisible. But neither of them would even think about becoming involved in any pranks. Hound was just plain too good-natured, and Mirage considered himself 'above' such things .Jade could've sworn she saw a pair of beady little eyes watching her from inside the ventilation duct when she passed it, but when she looked closer, it was gone.

It seemed the shadows really had been shadows.That, orwhoever they were concealing, it would seem, had escaped...

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

and yaknow Red's just gonna have a FIELD day with this...

they maynever hear the end of it!

MWUHAHAHAHA!


	6. Chapter 6

This chapter goes to my hubby. (husband). He's balding, and our last name is brush... put two and two together. Hehehehehe. We were watching veggietales with our 3-year old. (he's their biggest fan, I swear!), and the song "Oh where is my hairbrush" came on. My husband then turned, looked at me, and said: "Don't even say it!"

Grin>...

don't worry, though. If you don't know what veggietales is, it's a CGI children's cartoon about vegetables that act out stories to teach little kids good moral values. (It's also annoying as heck, at first, you you kinda get to like it wink>.)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tracks yawned, tossing his polishing rag on the desk. He sat down and turned the computer on, looking forward to getting his daily report written so he could get some rest. The startup screen flashed as the computer brought up the main screen. But instead of bringing up the desktop screen like it was supposed to, a video window popped up in the center of the monitor, expanding itself to cover the entire screen. Including the taskbar and startup menu at the very bottom of the page.

The Corvette tried frantically to exit.

nothing.

He even tried clicking on the little "X" in the upper right-hand corner of the screen.  
Instead of exiting, the computer made a clackling noise like a 3-inch-tall demon.  
"Now boys and girls, this is the part of the show where Larry the cucumber comes out and sings a song for us.

"What the slag?"

A C.G.I. (computer-animated) cucumber with bulgy green eyes and a nose and mouth hopped out onto the "stage" on the screen, wrapped in a towel.

click. click.

"exit allready!"

On the computer, a spotlight appears around the green vegetable, and he starts to sing.

"Oh wheeeeeere is my hairbrush"

"Oh wheeeeeere is my hairbrush"

the corvette stared in horror

"oh whereohwhereohwhereohwhereohwhereowhereohwheeeeere..."

CLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICK!"

...is my hairbrush"

"Grrr"

Tracks finally got smart and hit the power button.

nothing

except another maiacle cackle from the speakers.

"Someone's going to pay dearly for this." he mused.  
the video continued.

"upon hearing this, Junior Asparagus enters the scene, and..."

"Beep, click"

the corvette found the power cord and yanked it.

the computer screen went blank

"whew. I'm not sure how much more of that I could take."

The corvette turned the lights out and flopped unceremoniously onto his recharge berth. Prowl was going to hear about this.

tomorow.

After all, he couldn't go without his beauty sleep, now could he?

"good-night." Tracks shut off his optics.

"good'nite." came the cheery reply.

the corvette's opticscame back online real quick.

"Who's in here!" he demanded.

In the darkness, an erie light came on. Tracks sat up and looked at where it was coming from.

The computer monitor had somehow turned itself on. And there, standing in the middle of the black-colored screen was..

the cucumber from the video.

Track's optics got very round.

"and you would be?"

the jolly green vegetable on the screen just waved.

"Hi! I'm Larry the Cucumber." it said cheerily.

the covette's optics went wide.

"Uh, you've never seen a talking cucumber before, have you?" it asked, shifting half-embarrasedly"

Tracks wasn't sure what to make of it. Instead of saying what he wanted to, the corvette just gritted his teethplates and said. "No, I have not. Now will you kindly _go away_ and let me get some rest"

"Oh, okay." sounding dissapointed, the green CGI veggie just turned away and dejectedly hopped a couple paces. It paused like a mental light bulb had come on, and turned back around and hopped towards the screen.

"Hey, how about if I sing you to sleep. Lotsa kiddies like that"

"grr"

"No!...Thank you." Tracks rolled over so his back was to the computer.

"Uh, excuse me... mr... um.. whatever you are?" the computer figure said politely"

By now, Tracks wanted to just flop a pillow over his head or something.

"Yes." he gritted out.

"Don't you like music"

"no"

"why"

"would you please go away"

"but"

"JUST...go away"

finally, there was silence.

"about time." the blue Corvette mumbled.

He had just started to doze off when.

"rooock-a-bye baaaby, on the treeetooo"

"SHUT UP"

the CGI cucumber looked like it was pouting, then a stormcloud apeeared over it's head. "Fine. " it said angrily.

"If you don't like music you could've just said so"

"I DID say so!" then Tracks realized he was arguing with a computerized video character. A computer that he had just pulled the plug out of the wall of.

"how did you..."

Tracks suddenly bolted out of the room, right as the cucumber said quickly.

"whoops, gotta go"

Next door in an unused crew quarters room, two figures were howling with laughter in the darkness, over the screen of a laptop computer.

Suddenly there was a banging at the door, and Tracks's voice came through VERY clear. "

I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE. JUST WAIT TILL I GET MY HANDS ON YOU!"

the two figures looked at each other.

"whoops, gotta go!" the first said, and they bolted out the door on the other side of the room.


	7. Chapter 7

Okay, recap time! Prowl has been going nuts trying to figure out who's been doing what pranks, and only has a few of them figured out and keeps trying to get answers from people who don't want to tell him anything and the pranks are continuing and I keep getting stuck on two of them and my plotbunnies ran away and I broke my funnybone ow.

(whew! I can't believe I fit all that into one sentence Maybe I've had a little too much coffee I don't know do I sound like Blurr yet?)

o.O

Ahem...

whatI was really trying to say too paragraphs ago and wound up rambling was this:

**to Thatredcar:** Thank you so much for the reviews! I have a really bad habit of putting things off, and your reviews help me keep writing. Thanks again!

**to everyone else who reviewed:** thanks, and keep 'em coming!

well, I think I'm finally on the next-to-last chapter. I'm only planning on writing eight chapters, but I'm thinking about writing _another_ sequel, this time involving the year-before pranks.

Just thinking about it, though.

-

Well, here's another round of the-picking-on-the-Bumblebee. (I don't know why Prowl thinks he can get answers from him. Maybe it's because he's so soft and scare-able and he'll tell everything he knows if he thinks he's in trouble?)

anyway, enjoy.

* * *

"I don't know what you're talking about." Bumblebee looked at the floorpanels, his gaze not meeting the tactician's.

"I know you have information about who's been doing these pranks, Bumblebee." Prowl replied. He didn't have to say it, Bumblebee thought. He knew he was had. He'd known he was in trouble the instant he was called to Prowl's office.

He risked a glance up at the 2CO, who replied with a firm but knowing look.

"I know you were in on these pranks. And thought they might have been repercussions from last year's incident, we have to put end end to it before things get too out-of-control, and someone gets hurt." he surmised.

Bumblebee glanced up again. Whatever he had deduced so far, he obviously hadn't gotten any hard evidence.

his thoughts were cut off when Prowl said:

"Jade told me about you stealing Jazz's music"

she'd sold him out!

"But if you can tell me about what's going on, I can understand the situation better. I don't want to accuse anyone of something they didn't do"

Bumblebee was **sure** he was in trouble now. Prowl probably knew about what the twins were up to, too. He wondered if Jade had toldJazz he had stole his music. She probably had.

the minispy knew he never should have gotten involved in this stuff!

As though reading his mind, Prowl gave him an understanding look. "I know that you might have unwillingly been a part of these pranks, or even a willing participant. But I want to know who was planning it all. I'm sure you know."

the tactician pegged the minispy with a look. "If you're protecting whoever did these pranks, it's the same as being an accomplice to them"

Great.

He made it sound like a crime was being committed.

Bumblebee thought for a second. But after all, what did he have to lose? He might gain a few extra duty shifts, maybe. And if Prowl allready knew the twins had masterminded so much of it, they probably allready assumed he'd told on them. So it was now or never. And telling Prowl everything he knew would not only clear his poor overridden conchience, but save him from a lot of blame. And possibly some punishment.

he hoped.

The Volkwagen took a deep breath and let it out, then started to speak.

"It all started last year. Bluestreak, Sideswipe, Sunstreaker, Jazz, Tracks, Jade and I got into a little tiny prank war."

he paused, still unsure whether he'd get in trouble for admitting his guilt like this, but he was certain it was better than continuing to be an accomplice, and risking more trouble later.

Prowl folded his hands on the desk in front of him, and leaned forward slightly.

"Go on"

"Well, it all started when the twins stole Jazz's music and had me hide it for them"  
that made sense. Jade had admitted she stole the music and given it to the twins beforehand. So that was what happened afterward.

"And then Jade found it"

Bumblebee gazed at the floorpanels, wishing he could just sink right thru them. As for Prowl, though, he was allready assessing the fact that Bublebee was being truthfull, (or a damn good actor), and that he was finally going to get to the bottom of this.

"And I though it was wierd when Spike wanted me to run him to the grocery so late at night..."

"_Spike?"_ Prowl echoed. He certainly hadn't seen _that_ one coming. But then again, April Fools day was a human holiday, too. He was going to have to speak with that human. Spike should have known better than to take part in such immature activities. Besides the fact he was only a guest at the Arc. Not one of it's troups.

Bumblebee glanced up at the ventilation duct, wondering if Prowl had noticed the one in his quarters missing the covering yet. He abruptly brought his thoughts back to the present, though.

"Well, Jade was acting kinda funny, too. Like she wanted to know who you thought rigged the dispenser"

Prowl noted how she hadn't visited said dispenser that morning. "Do you think she and Spike were in on it together?" the tactician asked.

"Maybe, I don't know. " the minispy shrugged.

"Do you know who stole Wheeljack's paint, Bumblebee?" Prowl questioned.

"It wasn't stolen." the yellow VW answered softly.

"It...it was a setup. So no one would think twice about where it went." he flicked a glance up at the black and white Datsun, the spoke quickly, hoping to get the words out before he could lose his nerve and stop himself. whether for better or worse.

"_here goes_." he thought.

"We were trying to get back at Bluestreak for painting hippie flowers all over me last year, but I took a wrong turn. Or someone gave us the wrong maps...You two look so much alike, especially in the dark, and we couldn't tell it was you, I swear"  
Prowl raised his hands.

"Calm down, Bumblebee. who is 'we'?"

"Myself, Wheeljack, and Wyldkat."

"The blue Reliant?"

"yeah, that's her"

"okay." Prowl wondered just _how_ they had gotten into his room. He allways made sure his door was locked from the inside before going into recharge at night. Only an officer had the code to override it.

"What do you mean by 'map'?" he'd suspected the perpetrators had used the ventilation crawlways to enter his quarters. Why else would the grating over his recharge berth be missing?

"the velilation ducts. The twins gave us the map, but it must've been a wrong one. I didn't know. I'm sorry." so he _had_ noticed. This was not good at all.

Prowl only nodded. There was only one main ventilation shaft, big enough to accomadate anything larger than a human, that went to that level of the ship. After that, the ductwork split of into two slightly smaller crawlways, one on either side of the corridor, behind the crew quarters, and one directly above it. And since the officer's quarters were on the level directly above the crew quarters, they could have easily been misdirected.

Where the twins got the ships blueprints, however, was yet to be discovered.

Bumblebee was still staring at the floorpanels, sure has was in really big trouble this time. Prowl looked at him sternly, but said. "I will think about what type of reprimand to give you for your involvement in these pranks. But that will have to wait until all the other perpetrators are caught, and the exact circumstances of your involvement are clarified."

The minibot's head shot up, suprised.

"Dismissed." Prowl said crisply. Bumblebee had a deer-in-the-headlights look for a moment, but came back to reality, and decided to flee Prowl's office before anything else could be said.

"Most interesting." the tactician said, smirking to himself. He turned to his computer to type out a report, and go over a few other bits of evidence. A secondary camera in the commons room, crew duty rosters, and... what was this?

An email, sent directly to his computer from Teletraan-1? a tight-band transmission sent from the ark. Not through teletraan, but directly through a sattelite network in orbit. A transmission to a...cellphone?

Teletraan automatically picked up and recorded such transmissions for security purposes. But who would have a cellphone inside the Arc? None of the humans had one that he knew of.

But there was one Autobot on the premises, the only Autobot who could send and recieve tight-band transmissions over long distances. The tactician opened the folder and hit the "PLAY" button.  
------

Wyldkat stalked towards the Arc's cafateria/rec room, wondering why she kept getting funny looks from everyone who passed. The steel-blue colored car had the feeling she was going to have a bad day. She frowned to herself as she entered the cafateria and headed for the energon dispenser. Was it just her, or did something keep bumping her legs? She turned in a circle, being carefull where she stepped in case it was spike or Carly.

nope.

Neither human was in sight. But she did catch one of the Autobots stifling a snicker. A green military-type jeep. Hound, was that his name? She had only met him once, when she and Windstriker were on patrol once. But that was back when the two were still with Syus's group. That was more than half a year ago, now. Her scowl turned to suprise when she reached the dispenser, and saw her reflection in the glass.

Someone had thought it would be amusing to attach a pair of catlike ears and a long tail to her chassis. Not to mention the 'whiskers' painted on her face , complete with a black dot on the tip of her nose.

"Someone is going to PAY for this." she thought.

Outwardly, though, she kept her demeanor calm and normal, as though she had never seen her reflection. The Plymouth Reliant retrieved her cube, and turned to head back to her quarters, hoping she wasn't making it obvious she was trying to hurry.

"Meow"

she identified the voice as belonging to the red minispy seated at a table across the room.

Cliffjumper.

She acted as though she hadn't heard it, deciding not to give the prankster the satisfaction of getting a reaction from her, if he was in the room.

"Mrowrr"

her inward annoyance grew a little at the second jab, but she instead walked out, heading back to her quarters to get rid of the 'kitty costume', and find out who was behind it.  
-----------------

later that day...

The Arc's control room was a flurry of voices, obviously some sort of discussion about the recent events. Wyldkat noted the loudest one, belonging to the Arc's security chief, Red Alert. Something about firecrackers in the security office last night. The second one was Tracks, complaining about how nothing had been done about his computer being rigged up to play a children's cartoon, and hadn't been investigated.

"This has to stop!" Red Alert screeched, well aware he was several decibels over normal yelling volume.

"If they can sneak into the security office, they can infiltrate any part of the Arc! What if it had been a Decepticon! if Anyone can just hop into a ventilation shaft and..."

Prowl cut him off. "ventilation?"

Red Alert narrowed his eyes, his voice becoming very tight, and edged with fury.

"You heard me. the veltilation ductwork"

Obviously, the only thing from keeping the security officer from exploding with anger right now was the fact that Prowl was his superior.

"I see."

Red Alert fumed, but held his tongue (figuratively). He glanced around, and spotted Wyldkat.

"And where wre you last night!" he demanded.

Prime stepped in with: "Now Red, let's not go accusing anyone before we can prove it"

Red Alert glared daggers, still furious over the security breach that had happened.  
Ironhide stepped up "Whoever is doin' this has gotta be stopped b'fore it goes too far."

everyone started to talk at once, again.

Wyldkat shook her head at the scene. The noise was starting to give her a headache.

Prime raised his hands to shush the group. He sounded none too pleased at the situation.

" I agree. This has to be ended. and now, before things can get anymore out of hand."

Wyldkat moved aside as the leader stepped in front of teletraan-1

"Attention all Autobots, you are to assemble in front to the Arc in ten minutes." he turned to Prowl

"I just hope you found enough evidence to make the responsible parties come forward on their own. I don't want to make any blind accusations, but this has to be stopped"

the tactician only nodded. "I've made corrolations to all the pranks except one." Prowl handed the Red and blue semi the datapad.

"I think there's enough there to prove who was involved in which pranks"

Prime looked over the datapad, then up at Prowl and nodded.

"well done."

-------------------------------

well, it's been much fun writing this, but it all has to come to an end sometime. The next scene is going to be where everything gets revealed, including the two latest pranks. I wanted to add in some other hijinks (pranks), but I decided I've dragged this out long enough. That and I think I broke my funny bone. (ow.) (oo)

But I'll have a suprise in store for the final chapter. So don't worry. (I think you'll like it. (wink))


	8. Chapter 8

Guess what? remember how I said I had 8 chapters planned?  
I lied. I think it's going to wind up being more like 10 by the time I get finished. Oh well.  
It's so much fun, I don't think I want to stop!  
...  
I hope you can understand the half of this. I was trying to write it from Prowl's point of view, and I think I got a little to analytical (logical). LOL

* * *

All the Autobots had assembled outside the Arc's main entrance, except for Powerglide and a few others, who were still on patrol. Off to one side, Cliffjumper and the other minispies were talking about why they'd been called outside on such short notice. Gears was moaning and groaning per usual, something about trying to get a squeak out of his axles or something. The other Autobots laughed, chatted, and some wondered if there was a Decepticon attack, and why hadn't the base's alarm been sounded if there was.

The rabble quieted down and came to attention as Optimus Prime exited, followed by Prowl.

Both looked not only supremely displeased, but part of the reason for that was revealed when Red Alert came out of the Arc behind Prowl, looking more displeased than both the tactician and Optimus Prime put together.  
Actually, to put it accurately, he looked mad.

Prowl stayed standing beside Red Alert in front of the Arc's main entrance, and Prime went to one end of the line, and walked down, as though inspecting his troups. He summoned a commanding tone, then addressed the group.

"Red Alert informs me there has been a breakin in the security office. Anyone mind telling me how this happened"

he paused for a second, scrutinizing his troups, then said: "No. I didn't think so"

Prime walked back to his spot beside Prowl

"There has been a series of pranks happening around the Arc. You may think that these are games and all in fun, but it is creating unneccesary stress for all of the crew, and it is also now effecting the security of the Arc. I wantthis to stop before it gets any more out of hand."

He paced a few steps back and forth again, as though trying to decide how to handle the situation.

"I'm giving those involved in these activities the chance to step forward, and admit to their wrongdoing." he glanced at Prowl after saying that. The line was silent. The minispies whispered amongst themselves.

After a moment of silent indecisiveness,one figure stepped forward.

"I'm allready in trouble anyway." Jade thought.

after a minute or so, it seemed nobody else wanted to step up and face the inevitable. Sunstreaker snickered at her for giving in so easily at the first sign of trouble.

**"What?"** the muave and blue seeker addressed the lined up soldiers with a slightly cocky aire.

"I guess I'm the only one to step up and face the music, huh"

another moment.

"Whatever."

she turned back around, and steeled herself for the reprimand. Not that it would be that scathing coming from Prowl. She'd been in so much trouble with him it wasn't funny. But coming from Prime himself. She knew that was going to hurt.

Prowl walked over to stand in front of her, his face stern and reprimanding. she knew it. She'd probably be staring at the inside of a brig for the next 48 hours. Just because he was tired of dealing with her.

"Here it comes." Sunstreaker whispered, almost inaudibly, but still gleefully.

Prowl heard it.

"you may go." he told the jet.

"Whu-!" she was momentarily caught off-gaurd by his proclamation, but just as quickly reeled it back in.

"yessir." she hurried toward the entrance. She passed the twins with a whispered

"so long, suckas!"

Prime caught her arm as she passed.

"Not so fast"

"aww. I knew that was too easy"

Prowl shot the blue and red Autobot leader a querilous look, but didn't question his decision. The jet trudged back to her spot.

"All right." Prime began.

"Since none of you want to take responsibility for your actions, I have no choice, but to leave it to Prowl to reveal the findings of his investigation.

Red Alert crossed his arms and waited, smirking.

"the following Autobots will step forward." the Datsun commanded. The people in the line glanced from side to side, wondering if the person next to them was one of the pranksters. It had allready been established that there was more than one. And everyone wondered who they were.

"Sideswipe, Sunstreaker." those two were usual.

"Wyldkat." that earned a wolf-whistle from Cliffjumper.

"Cliffjumper" Wyldkat grinned at him. At least she wasn't going down alone.

"Wheeljack." several chuckles broke out at that.

"What did he do, blow up the workshop again?" Windcharger snickered to Brawn beside him. Prowl ignored the comment.

"Jade" she rolled her eyes and stepped forward, crossing her arms.

"Bumblebee." the minispies gawked. Bumblebee guiltily trudged forward a few steps, his gazemeeting only the ground guiltily.

"Bluestreak." a few bots started to look panicked. Maybe Prowl had a glitch in his microprocessor. Brawn harrumphed. Tracks and Mirage exchanged a knowing glance.

"and..." Prowl looked for the last person on the list, but he wasn't in the line.

Jazz chose that minute to jog out of the Arc, and up behind Prowl.

"Hi guys, soory I'm late, I..." the Porche trailed off when he realised the way the tacticion was looking at him.

"wha'd I do?"

he looked confused. Prowl pointed to the line. Jazz sauntered over and stood beside Wyldkat.

"and Jazz." Prowl finished. Several 'bots exchanged shocked glances. Jazz would never do something like that! besides the fact that he was an officer, and even if he did do anything, he was too good to get caught, right?

nope. guess not.

they waited a second, taking in the reactions of the rest of the group. If there was anyone who as involved they didn't know about, they would know by the time this inquiry was over.

Prime waited for the mumbling to simmer down to silence, then nodded. "The rest of you may go. "

Without hesitation, the rest of the troups headed into the Arc.

Halfway down the main corridor, Hoist pulled Inferno over to one aside, "Dont'chya want to see what happens next?" thered-colored Infernoglanced at the entrance.

"Yeah, but I don't wanna stick around and be accused of anything. I think Prowl's got a glitch in his processor or something."

Hoist thought for a moment, then said "Hang on, I've got an idea."

the two made their way inside. "I've got the perfect idea." Hoist went over to Teletraan-1 and tapped a couple keys. One of the outside cameras switched on, and the audio and video filled the entire screen, inviting the crowd of Autobots to flock around it and watch the show.

Prowl scanned the line-up, and started to read his report...

1. Jade stole Jazz's music, in revenge for last year's pranks on her involving several hundred red-backed tarantulas. She replaced it with what was described, in the jet's own words as "the world's most annoying pop music and boybands." Jazz, not knowing who was behind the prank, attempted to turn the prank against the prankster by having an impromptu dance party in the commons room (I note here disturbing the peace).

2. Later, after not having obtained satisfactory revenge on his target, somehow discovered that Jade was breaking into the officer's lounge/cafateria and helping herself to the energon supply there. (breaking and entering, theft) After making arrangement with a human associate, who shall hereby remain nameless, managed to obtain a rather large supply of Prune juice, equivalent to exactly three normal energon cubes in volume. The amount of each of the previous thefts. which was rigged into the dispenser unit. Which, according to Jade's description, was also a human analogy, a 'prune' meaning someone who has no sense of humor.

3. This not only dissuaded the energon thief, but was a complete mishandling of the situation, and the proper authorities should have been notified instead of taking matters into his own hands. Other evidence: A tight-band transmission was sent directly to a cellphone in Portland, via an orbiting cellphone company sattelite, not through Teletraan-1. the Arc's main computer, however, has the ability to intercept these type of messages, and records them automatically, for security purposes. Also, due to the energon theft, a secondary camera was set up inside the commons room. It was positioned over the main door, and aimed directly at the dispensers. Although the commons room lights were turned off, there was more than enough light provided from the hallway to see who the culprit was.

4. the accomplices: Jade had given the pilfered music to Sunstreaker and Sidewsipe to hide, who in turn passed it to Bumblebee for yet unknown reasons. but Jade decided not to risk being double-crossed, and followed Bumblebee from the twin's quarters to the storage bay and waited for him to leave in order to recover it. She then led Bumblebee to believe she knew about him stealing it, and he played along, in order to protect the twins. (Bumblebee was indebted to the twins after they helped him plan a prank against Bluestreak. Who had in the previous year painted- and I quote: "hippie flowers" (Bumblebee's words)- all over his chassis.) The twins were guilty in this paint-related prank also. see paragraph 5 (below.) Bumblebee honestly believed Jade was the one who had rigged the dipenser in the officer's lounge, and even lied to the twins to that end. That is superfluous to the investigation, however.

5. Bumblebee convinced Wheeljack and Wyldkat to help him act out a plan of revenge on Bluestreak for painting flowers all over him the previous year (Breaking and entering, assaulting an officer, false implications of theft (whatever it's called), witholding/concealment of classified information.) Using maps given to them by Sunstreaker and Sideswipe, were misdirected into breaking into the personal quarters of the second in command of the Autobot Army (that's one step under assaulting Prime, mind you.) and repainted small dots of red paint all over their target. The Twins, Sideswipe, and Sunstreaker are guilty for supplying the classified blueprints of the Arc's ventilation shafts.

6. The evidence to back this up is that the same method was used the year before to avoid the security system in Jade's quarters. The redesigned storage bay was also protected by a very sensitive security system, designed by the leader of the team Jade was a member of before joining th Autobots. The room was a base of operations for the group, and was converted to regular crew quarters, with the exception of the security system, after they returned to their home-dimension.

7. This gives evidence that the twins had help in procuring the blueprints of the ventilation shafts. Unfortunately, Teletraan-1 is completely unhackable. The only people in the Arc with clearance to view those files are the ranking officers. The files were accessed, and printed, by an officer. The same one who conspired with the twins to fill Jade's "bedroom" with red-backed tarantulas. After the prank, the blueprints, stored on a holomap crystal, were supposedly lost. Fearing he might be caught, Jazz didn't persue looking for it. But Sideswipe and Sunstreaker had it the entire time.

8. Also, my original suspicion of the twins being involved with the paint incident was true, and their punishments for those actions have been served. However, it has also become evident that the twins, believing that Jade had betrayed their 'alliance' and come forward with further evidence against them, made an attempt to gain revenge. This involved four cases of firecrackers and other various explosives being set off in the security office while Jade was on duty there, as punishment for her breaking and entering and theft charges. (see dispenser theft, second paragraph)

9. According to the Arc's veltilation blueprints, there is one main ventilation shaft that runs through the main levels of the arc, then split off into three smaller ducts. one runs above the hallway, and one runs behind the crew quarters on each side. This is how Bumblebee managed to infiltrate my quarters. The main shaft passes right over the security office, before splitting off into it's three junctions above the office. Sideswipe crawled into the ductwork and maneuvered to position himself over the grating above the security office. How he did this without it giving way, I have no ideas. But while dropping the firecrackers, the motion created a shadow that Red Alert and Jade both saw. After detonating the explosives, Sideswipe then crawled back to his starting point, in storage bay 3. There, Sunstreaker was waiting, who helped him resecure the covering. His entrance to the storage room at 1:30 a.m. was caught on one of the arc's security cameras, as was his exiting the same room at 2:15, covered in dust.

10. The evidence to this is traces of the same dirt-material scattered on the storage bay floor, and trailed out the door. Also, the same type of material was found outside and inside the twins's quarters. The storage bay, which hasn't been used in quite a while had developed a dust layer, which perfectly outlined the footprints of both culprits upon entrance and exit.

11. As for Track's personal computer being rigged. Another case of breaking and entering, tampering with computer files (invasion of privacy, Tracks claims). While Tracks was out on patrol, Wyldkat and Jade entered Tracks's quarters, and spliced his personal computer's power input unit (power cord) to a power pak, whick was stolen from the repairbay by Sunstreaker. Sunstreaker had gone to the repairbay after an accident while on patrol with Hound in the southern sector (see paragraph 7). While in the repairbay, Sunstreaker managed to grab and subspace one of Ratchet's spare Emergency Power Paks, which are used in triage situations, to stablize the energy levels of injured soldiers on the battlefield.

12. The power pak was attatched to the computer to keep it running if the power cord was pulled. A mobile link was established, but only within 50 feet of the target (computer). If it had been any longer of a distance, the laptop sending the information would have automatically boosted the output, and alerted teletraan-1. This was made evident after one of the members of Jade's group, Bullet (six months ago) made an attempt to hack into Teletraan-1's security protocols from 50 yards west of the Arc's main entrance. It was unsuccessfull. Also, the only laptop with the capacity to run such complex programs was the one that belonged to Bullet. The laptop was alledgedly destroyed when Red Alert sent an energy backlash across the linkup.

However, given the technology and recources, it is possible Bullet could have created another laptop similar to the first. Jade is still in contact with her group, even though they are no longer a part of this war.

13. I have also discovered several emails, sent between Wyldkat, Wheeljack, and Bluestreak, discussing various plans of - and I quote "Revenge Pranks" - on various other Autobots. Some of which were rather... inventive. But descriptions of those are not pertinent to the investigation, as they were never acted upon.

* * *

I'm still trying to get all the facts together. I seem to have lost a few writer's notes along the way. But that's kind ofthe basics of who did what and why. I'll try to work in the "revenge roster" person1 pranks person2 pranks person 3 pranks person1, a cause-and-effect type timeline. But I hope this chapter was interesting!

more up soon! -


	9. Chapter 9

Well, here it is, the next-to-last chapter. I had to get everything organized before I could get it written. It was kinda hard to get all the point of view peices written out, but I think it came out okay.

Prowl stepped back from reading his report, and nodded to Optimus, who stepped forward. He decided to start at the top of the list. The tall red and blue semi walked over to Sunstreaker, who kept his expression as neutral as possible, given how much trouble he was in. Prime and Prowl had allready discussed possible reprimands, and prime thought Prowl's suggestion for "Sunstreaker"  
Those watching on Teletraan-1 shushed each other and quieted down, axious to see what fate was about to befall the yellow Lamborgini.

"I believe the washroom has gotten a bit muddy lately." Sunstreaker's face involuntarily darkened angrily. He wouldn't.

would he?

"Prowl will provide you with the appropriate cleaning supplies, and be overseeing your work"

he would.  
And Prime was standing there, just daring him to say something back. But knowing he wouldn't. Sunstreaker hopefully had more sense than that.

"Yes, _sir_." Sunstreaker half-growled, carefull not to let his tone be too disrespectfull. He didn't want Prime adding more punishment onto the end of that.

The Autobot leader walked away, and headed towards the next person on his list. Red Alert and Prowl watched from beside the Arc's main entrance, slightly amused. hopefully this would teach those immature enough to challenge Prowl (He thought they would have learned by now).

It unnerved him slightly at seeing one of the officers involved in the mischief this time, though. Hopefully, it wouldn't happen again. Every year on April first. Although this year they had started early, to probably throw Prowl off. Weren't pranks supposed to be played on april Fools Day? maybe that was why they started the ruckus a week early. Because they had known Prowl would be expecting it. He thanked Primus they would all be busy on April first of this year, though. Whether it be scrubbing washracks, or helping Ratchet re-organize the repairbay.

"Scrub the washracks, he says" Sunstreaker growled under his breath. He glared at both Sideswipe and Bumblebee.

"I'll bet that yellow little coward told Prowl everything the instant he asked him about it, just to save his own hide!"

Sunstreaker reminded himself to give the little wimp a good beating for it next time they were alone in the commons room, too. Just thinking what all that soap and cleaning solutions to do to his poor lovely waxed exterior. It would take him several hours of re-waxing and polishing just to get it back in the condition it was now, if not longer. Not to mention his chassis wasn't as well-kept now as it should be, to begin with.

And Sideswipe... Sunstreaker glared hatefully at his twin brother. Sideswipe was going to regret even getting him involved in these pranks in the first place. First thing he was going to do when he got back to their quarters tonight was throw everything that belonged to the little red RAT out into the hallway. Then lock the door after him!

Even 'starting' to think about his ruined exterior made Sunstreaker shiver involuntarily. What had he done to piss the universe off? he sighed. Everyone knew how much pride he took in his good looks. And he wasn't given a gorgeous Italian racecar as an alt. form for no reason. And there was no sense in letting such a beautiful stylish chassis go to ruin with rust and dirt. The others just didn't understand things like he did!

And the scratches! oh, the scratches! he might as well have been given a Honda as an alt mode if he was going to be crawling around on his hands and knees in the muck washing floorpanels! he was a warrior, for Primus's sake! not a maintenance drone! and he had a beautiful chassis to take care of!

Sure, his comrades had made fun of him for it, but what would someone back in Iacon think if a mech who was dirty, scratched, and rusty walked up to them? they would think they were no better than riffraff! a lowlife! Given, Hound was allways dirty, smelly, and scratched, that was given.but he was a scout. It was his job, the Lamborgini guessed. But you still had to wonder about someone who didn't even care enough to make themself presentable in public!

If someone didn't have the pride to (or even care about) keeping themselves clean and well-polished, how would that reflect on how much they cared about anything else? People like that didn't care, he guessed. If they were enough of a slob to be dirty and scratched and barely-polished all the time, fine. But he had more pride in his appearance than that, I'm sorry. The yellow Lambo gave a sulking look at at the entrance to the Arc, and at Prowl and Red Alert standing there. He just hoped he could figure out a way to keep his carefully-maintained exterior from being completely ruined.

Prime waklked over to where Bumblebee stood. The poor minibot looked as miserable as could be. Except for the fact that he had come forward with information that had led to the the final breakthrough on the case, he knew he had been in on a lot of the pranks. He just stared at the ground, thoroughly sorry he had let it get as far as he had.

"And assisted with the concealment and usage of classified information"

he knew he was in for it now. He brought himself out of his thoughts just in time to hear Prowl finish his sentence

"And provided me with the evidence nessesary to solve this case."

He knew that wouldn't help. Why hadn't he said 'no'? He knew he had been weak-willed and naeive to accept help from the twins on anything. He had knew from the beginning they were going to use their knowledge of his plans to blackmail him into helping them.

"But Bluestreak deserved it!" he inwardly yelled. He wouldn't say that out loud. Oh no, not ever. **Especally** not to Prime or Prowl. He had **way** to much respect for them to do that. He had been trying to stay in good graces with them, not be seen as a troublemaker like Sideswipe or Sunstreaker! he wanted to be thought of as a nice guy. Someone you could talk to if you were having a bad day, and trust not to stab you in the back or tell your business to everyone in the Arc as soon as you turn around.

He didn't like the idea of being lumped into the same category as the two Lamborgini twins. Sure, they had respect, maybe even other bots feared them. He hoped hanging out with them would maybe make the other bots think less of him as a 'little bug' and more of a regular, respectable bot.

But then, it wasn't their kind of respect he had wanted.He had wantedrespect for being sensitive or caring, or a good listener. He was sorry enough he wanted to crawl under a rock and hide. He felt like he physically wilted under his leader's stare. He forced himself to look up, even though he really didn't want to. The yellow minibot's insides twisted into a knot at the thought of what Optimus was going to say to him. He had only wanted his leader's respect, and acknowledgement. Not his dissaproval. Just the thought of Prime being mad at him made him feel worse.

'Bumblebee"

Yessir." the minispy said in a small voice.

Prime paused, as though expecting him to say something more than that. an apology, maybe? But he just couldn't make the words come out. He was so ashamed.

"Your duty shifts will be doubled for the next two weeks, during which time you are to stay at least 100 feet from both Sideswipe and Sunstreaker. If you are seen or heard making contact with them, those two weeks will be doubled. Do you understand"

"yes." Bumblebee squeaked again. He made eye contact with Prime and realized Prime was a little less angry with him. Or maybe it was just his imagination. He felt horrible enough already. Maybe Prime figured that, or maybe we was that he'd helped Prowl find out who had done what. Either way, his own guilt felt worse than any punishment Prowl could ever dish out.

Prime nodded and moved on to the next person on his list .

Sideswipe.

"I believe Ratchet could use some help reorganizing the repairbay. I also believe he mentioned something about spring cleaning?" the leader had a slightly amused tone to his voice. Sideswipe was far from amused, though.

Sideswipe's face fell when he learned of his fate.

"You mean son of a recycling unit." he inwardly swore at the tactician, knowing he'd suggested it, and saw the smirk that flickered across Prowl's faceplate as the tactician knew he'd hit the mark.

"Tactician one, red twin zero." Prowl mentally noted.

"Just wait till next year." Sidewipe promised.

Although, from the glare his brother was giving him, he wasn't sure if he wanted to. "Sunny might be my twin, but sure can get pissed." Sidewipe then realized what assignment Prowl had just given his yellow twin.

Sideswipe inwardly winced. "I'm gonna hear about that one tonight." he noted, breaking his brother's glaring gaze to look at the ground. "Oh, I'm sure Ratchet is gonna love the hell out of this." Sideswipe gritted his dental plates at the thought. He remembered getting yelled at every time he entered the repairbay. And that was whether he needed repairs or not. He could just imagine what kind of objects would be pinging off his helmet every five minutes this time.

Although he hoped Ratchet wouldn't throw that paperweight he kept on his office desk at him again. That thing HURT! Sideswipe winced once again, and he could have SWORN he saw Prowl smirk back. He glared daggers in response. But his face didn't cooperate. It just came out as a balefully sorry puppy-dog look.

Great. Just great. Not only was his twin brother mad at him, but also Bumblebee (not that it really mattered, he was only a minispy, after all.) But he also felt really bad about getting Jazz in trouble over those blueprints. How did Prowl find out the saboteur had gotten them in the first place? He knew he should have said something, like Jazz didn't know he had them, or maybe lie and say he'd stolen the blueprints of the ductwork. But that would mean lying and taking extra blame for someone else. Nuh-uh. Not him. Not the Arc's best prankster. He didn't get that title by defending other people.

Besides, the first rule of pranking states it is every mech for hiself. And every action has it's consequence, whether it be gaining the advantage or information someone else has allready used; Or when making an alliance, only take the blame you have to. Or less if possible. If all else fails, deny everything, and blame your co-conspirator. Sure, it may result in them getting you back, but that's half of the fun! it's allways more of a challenge.

Sideswipe was busy imagining the tactician hangin by the feet over the ar'c main boosters, till he was jolted out of his thoughts. "Do you have anything to say for yourself, Sideswipe?" Optimus rumbled.

"Uh."

"think quick! think quick! stupid!" he thought. the red Lamborgini mentall slapped himself. He kept his head down, and looked sorrowfully up at the Autobot leader like a whipped puppy. "I'm sorry, sir." he whimpered. He knew it wouldn't get him out of his punishment, but he hoped maybe the puppy-dog look might get his sentence reduced.

Optimus didn't look impressed by it in the slightest. Instead, he turned back away from the red twin, to continue his way down the lineup. Sideswipe mental kicked himself for being so careless. He swore next year he'd be SO much more carefull!

And Prowl didn't have any sense of humor, either. so there.

Sideswipe pouted.

Life was so unfair...

Of course, that was almost the same as what a certain unfortunate jet was thinking at the moment.

Prime walked over to Where Jade was standing with a faroff look in her optics, deep in thought at the moment.

"Where did I go wrong? (sigh) I knew I shouldn't have trusted the twins." she thought.

"Not to metion I was allready in trouble for other things. I can't believe Jazz was the one who rigged the dispenser. Hahaha! no way! and here I thought he was too good-natured to 'come down to my level' (snicker) note to self: get him back but good.

Well, at least I confessed to a couple of my 'crimes' (or so Prowl would put them.) I hope that'll make him go easier on me. Oh. I didn't think he knew about the laptop. Great. note to self: return Bullet's laptop with haste. He'd kill me if he knew I'd gotten his new laptop confiscated, after having his last one blown up by teletraan"

Prime was standing there, an expectant look on his face. Despite her still-mischevious thoughts, the jet really was sorry for what she had done. She didn't like being in trouble at all. She had never made a lick of trouble in her life. Until she met the twins, and the april fools day pranks started.

"I knew I shouldn't have gotten caught. Where did I go wrong?

stupid, stupid, stupid!..

"Jade"

"yes sir." it was just louder than a whisper." She could FEEL those sapphire eyes boring right through her. He was mad! she knew he was mad!

she just hoped he wouldn't send her home. She had stayed here when her friends returned home because she wanted to- well, that was a lengthy explanation.

"Do you have anything you'd like to say in your defense"

"No" she squeaked. She felt about that small, too. She couldn't look up. Meet his gaze. She vowed silent revenge.. no. that was what had gotten her into this in the first place. But damn if she wasn't mad at several mechs.

"Very well." Prime's tone had lifted ever-so-slightly. "You will spend the next 48 hours in the brig."

oh that was COLD! everyone seemed a little suprised at his harshness, but Prime was done playing the softhearted leader role. He'd had it with the pranks and other shennanigans.

"You have had more than enough chances to prove your responsibility, but instead you have acted immature, disrespectful, and shown no repect for the rules or command structure here"

he paused, knowing the second part of his reprimand wouldn't be as bad as the first.

"However."

"During the next three days you will be continuing security monitor duty with Red Alert during the night shift." she glanced at the red and white security officer out of the corner of her optic. He seemed as suprised as she was.

"Do I make my self clear"

unable to find her voice without whimpering, she simply nodded. He walked away.

"Wheeljack"

"Yes,sir"

"You are banned from your workshop for one month. You shall not take part in any sort of technical projects or repairwork unless it is a Decepticon attack and Ratchet requires your assistance.

A cheer echoed from inside the Arc.

Prowl, Prime, and Red Alert all gave each other a look, and Red Alert bolted into the Arc. Muffled snickers echoed down the lined up mechs, but were soon cut off by a stern look from Prowl.

meanwhile inside the Arc...

"Quick, someone's coming"

"Turn it off! turn it off"

click

"What in the heavens is going on in here!" Red Alert demanded.

"Uh, nothing." Brawn looked at some of the surrounding 'bots for help.  
In one corner, Ratchet threw a handfull of cards on the table.

"Just playing a little poker, Red; Thats all.

"Lost again, Ratch."Ironhide grinned. The CMO pegged him with a look.

" Just wait till the next round"

Red Alert harumphed. I'm watching you guys. He made a finger-eye motion and walked away.

"uh-huh.Okay Red." Ironhide called after him.

He waited a minute, to make sure the Security director had exited the Arc, and everyone scrambled back to their places in front of Teletraan's screen.

Meanwhile, the drama continued.

"One month without being allowed in my workshop?" Wheeljack thought. "What if I have an idea? what if the Autobots need an invention for some reason or another? I've got so may ideas I want to try out. I came up with three new ones today. I can understand Prowl was mad about the paint thing and all, (I guess I owe him an apology, at the least), but it was an honest mistake.

If I had known it wasn't Bluestreak's quarters, I would have painted up the twins for giving us the false directions! I should've known something wasn't right. Damn me for not following my gut feeling. Well, at least it wasn't as bad as what some of the others got. Poor Sideswipe. I feel sorry for him. heh.

I'm suprised Prime ordered Wylkat and I to repaint the hallway. I thought he'd never let us anywhere near any paint ever again after what happened. Oh well. I guess Prowl's gonna make sure he stays on the other side of the base as us. heh.

Wonder how Prowl even got the idea to make us repaint? I mean, the Autobots have never been concerned about what the inside of the arc looks like. There's allways too many repairs and other things that need to be done. Maybe I'll suggest it. Oh, duh. No wonder I didn't get assigned repair duty. It's too much like what I've been doing in my workshop all this time. They probably think I'd enjoy that too much. Heh, oh well.

Although I am sorry I dissapointed Prime so badly. I didn't mean any harm by it. I thought it was all in good fun. Pranks are never supposed to harm anyone. Or to interfere with the detection or prevention of decepticon attacks. That's a rule. Everyone here knows it. Even Sideswipe.

I guess I should stop making excuses and face reality. What we - What I did was wrong. Not to mention lying to Prowl AND Prime. I was kinda hoping Prowl would find out who else was doing the pranks, but I didn't mean to waste his time or anything. And concern Prime needlessly. He probably had more important things to worry about. Like how we're going to stop Mega-jerk and the Decepticons.

Wyldkat was standing silently, looking up at the camera over the Arc's main entrance, and had a sneaking suspicion they were being watched.

"I wonder if I should tell Red Alert. Nah, he probably allready knows. The cheer from inside when Wheeljack got banned from his workshop was a dead giveaway"

She saw Prime heading in her direction, and her frame of thinking quickly changed.

"What do I say here? I'm sorry would be a start. Yeah. I owe Prowl the first one. Okay, that's a start. I owe Prime one, too. For making him waste his time trying to figure out who stole Wheeljack's paint"

"Wyldkat." she was face to face with the red and blue leader. She made herself meet his gaze, like a respectfull soldier.

"I'm sorry"

She wasn't sure he was expecting that, but he just stood there.

"Go on."

"I'm sorry for wasting both your and Prowl's time with such immaturity. And I apologize to Prowl for the paint thing. It was an honest mistake, and I know I never should have been involved in such a sophmoric plan." She flicked a gaze at the tactician. She saw the look on Sunstreaker's face out of the corner of her optic. "Suckup" he said under his breath. The blue Reliant's hearing picked up on it, but she decided to ignore it.

He knew better than to say it loud enough to be heard. With all the posessing-classified-info and all. She mentally noted to apologize to Jazz, too. If she and Wheeljack hadn't agreed to help Bumblebee get revenge on Bluestreak, or even decided to ask the twins for help, he might not have been pulled into this. And maybe those blueprints might have stayed out of sight. She knew he was in big trouble. What Prime was going to do about it, though, she wasn't sure yet.

Prime nodded. "You can help Wheeljack repaint the hallway." She suddenly realised it was paint that had gotten them into trouble in the first place. "Is that it?" she thought as Prime started to walk away. "And you are confined to quarters for the next 3 days, with the exception of regular patrols, and helping Wheeljack repaint"

The Reliant only nodded. "Oh, and Wyldkat"

"Sir."

"I am not to hear one musical note coming from anywhere in even your vicintiy. Do you understand"

"Yes sir."

drat. there goed the 'ol whistle while you work routine. she thought as Optimus walked towards the other end of the line.

Prime obviously knew how Wyldkat and Jazz shared a love for the same type of music.

She suddenly had a pang of jealousy fo the Porshe. At least he could listen to music through internal sensors, (which were kind of like having headphones) and nobody else could hear it.

Speaking of the Porsche, she semi-glanced at him, standing beside her, his head bowed in silence. He knew he was big in trouble. He was mature enough to know the difference between foolish pranks and good-natured jokes. And that as an officer he was supposed to be a role model for those of the lesser ranks...

Wyldkat elbowed him lightly to get his attention, and have him a reassuring grin and wink. He replied with a question mark look, but Wyldkat returned her attention to the two leaders and angry security officer. Red Alert had calmed down a little. At least he didn't look like he was going to explode from the tension anymore. Earlier she could have sworn she saw smoke coming from those little receptor-horn-things on his head...

Cliffjumper wasn't happy. He'd played the game and gotten caught. He hadn't really been part of it, more less just an accomplice. "Bluestreak was the mastermind." he thought.

"Cliffjumper." Prime stared down at the red minispy sternly.

"Oh, so now he's gonna peg part of this bull on me, too? Well, boy do I have news for him. That underhanded little she-bot had it coming to her! anyway, everyone allways underestimates us minibots. Now who's laughing now, kitty cat?" he thought.

Cliffjumper kept his scowl in place, but remembered how good it had felt to finally deliver the much-awaited kick in the skidplate to the blue-colored Wyldkat. Oh yes, he and Bluestreak had gotten into her quarters that night, and used instant bonding glut adhere the "cat ears and tail" to Wyldkat's armor.

"So, she thinks she's something special, does she? well just because she hangs out with Jazz and kisses up to the brass doesn't make her anything special. Cliffjumper huffed silently and rolled his eyes at her.

"Look at her standing all pretty at attention when Prime comes close to her. She thinks she's such a model soldier. I'll bet she can't do even half of what I can. And not to mention she's female, too." he thought.

"Cliffjumper." Prime was using that commanding voice again.

"Your duty shifts will also be doubled for the next two weeks"

"that was too easy." the minispy thought.

"And I want you to give Wyldkat a sincere apology." Snickering could be heard in the background.

Cliffjumper narrowed his eyes. Why should he have to apologize to that little femme-kissup? he looked at her.

"I'm sorry." he said flatly. Prime gave him a scrutinizing look.

He stepped out from the line, turned towards the blue car, cleared his throat, and said loudly enough to be heard down the line: "I'm sorry, Wyldkat"

Inside, the control room exploded in a cacaphony of laughter. "Did you see the look on his face?" Hound laughed from one side of the room. "Yeah, I'll bet he'll be sorry for that one for weeks." Brawn laughed back.

Meanwhile, back outside...

Bluestreak was going nuts inside. His thoughts were running twice as fast as his vocaliser usually did, going in circles over how much trouble he was in and what kind of punishment he was going to get for it.

"Oh.. I knew it!" he thought. "I knew something was gonna go wrong! we never sould have played that prank on Wyldkat! we never should have played that prank on Bumblebee last year! What have I gotten myself into! Prowl is gonna have my rear axle! damn you Cliffjumper. Dang it stupid me for getting myself into it. Why did I even start this? it was my fault, I was the one who came up with the idea to paint those cute little five-petalled 'hippie flowers' all over Bumblebee. Poor guy..."

His thoughts trailed off when he realized Prime was staring down at him. The Charcoal and white gunner lifted his head to meet his leader's gaze directly.

"I'm sorry. It was irresponsible of me. And it was my idea to paint hippie flowers all over Bumblebee last year, and to play the prank on Wyldkat this year." he said in a barely-even voice.

"So it was you two!" Wyldkat exclaimed.

Apologizing, he thought,was the hardest thing he had to do. But he made himself face the blue femme, forcing the image of cat's ears and whiskers out of his mind.

(It was pretty funny)

"Yes. I'm sorry, Wyldkat." Prime also glanced at the Reliant. She looked stunned momentartily the caught herself and shrugged it off. "It's okay."

"Bluestreak, I think it would be appropriate if you were assigned to help Sideswipe and Ratchet clean and reorganize the repairbay.

At the other end of the line, Sideswipes' eyes went round. Bluestreak looked back at him with the same expression.

Sideswipe's first thought was: "Oh no. He talks enough as it is! now he's gonna be jabbering in my audios the whole time we're cleaning the repairbay!" then he added "I hope Ratchet knocks him out first."

Bluestreak was thinking "Well, at least I'll have someone to talk to. Unless Ratchet knocks him silly again. He never did like Sideswipe. I wonder why?...

Optimus knew that the last person on his list was going to be the hardest. Why Jazz had decided to joing in the pranks was the first question. He was an officer, for matrix sake. Honestly, he should have been mature enough to know better. Not to mention the blueprints, the rigging the dispenser, the general mayhem that had been caused. It gave Prime a headache just to think of it. And this had been going on since last year. (?)

This was the hardest part of his job as a leader. Optimus really didn't want to have to deal with this. It was bad enough Sideswipe and Sunstreaker were doing pranks, but they had gained the participation of several other mechs in the recent times, and now this?

The Autobot leader strode over to the last person on his list. The black and white saw him coming and straightened his posture to stand at attention.

"I'm dissapointed in you, Jazz." The Porsche didn't move or say a word. He knew it wouldn't help. Prime shook his head.

"Why?"

"well," Jazz looked over at Jade as though to answer Prime's question. It didn't help.

"uh"

he looked up at Prime, at a loss for words. Prime patiently waited. the saboteur finally spoke.

"It was all in fun. I didn't intend to hurt no one. If I'd know those blueprints were that important I wouldn't 'ave gotten em" he finally said.

"I see." Prime mused. He turned his back to his special operations officer.

"Since you have acted with the same maturity level as the other soldiers, instead of an officer." Prime took a breath. He hated to do this.

"For the next thirty days your rank will be reclassified as a soldier, until you can prove you can uphold the rights and responsibilites of a ranking officer"

he could _hear_ the jaws practically hitting the ground. The Arc's control room went deathly silent.

"During which time, you are to carry out the duties of any other soldier, and shall not listen to or give evidence of listening to any form of terran music,and/or dancing."

Prime turned back to face the black and white, using a less commanding tone now. He chose his words carefully before continuing.

"Next time you decide to do something immature and mischevious, think carefully before acting." Jazz looked up and caught his meaning. After all, that _was_ the black-and-white's job description being sneaky and all. Had Prime known about last year's prank? He couldn't tell for sure, but he was pretty sure he caught a glint of something, perhaps humor? in the leader's eyes.

Was what he had meant when he said "Think carefully" was "don't get caught", perhaps? Prime nodded and went back to beside Prowl and Red Alert.

"You all have your orders. they Start as of right now. Dismissed." Everyone glanced at each other, as though not sure what to do. Bumblebee let out a small sigh of relief and headed into the Arc, Cliffjumper trailing after him.

Inside, everyone scrambled and scattered to somewhere else, trying to look like they were anywhere but watching the proceedings. Ratchet just leaned back in his chair and tossed his cards on the table.

"Care for another round?" he asked.

"Nah. I've got stuff I've got 'ta get back 'ta doin." Ironhide replied, getting up.

"Just tah not ta go too hard on em, kay Ratch?" the southern accented mech added. The red and whte Ratchet just grinned. "You know me." he said cheerily.

"ah know. That's why ah said that." Ironhide mumbled as he lumbered out of the room.

Ratchet took another long swig of high-grade. "It's gonna be a long day." he muttered, feeling his good mood dissipating allready.

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Yes, I know. Not much for chapter notes here. I ran out of things to say. Although, if you want to see the profile for my fanchar, just in case my profile link doesn't work, the address is (just take out the spaces after the slashes and dots in the address)

http/ www. freewebs. com/ tfrebellion/ fancharprofiles1 .htm

some of my other fanchars are listed there too, so you might have to go down the page a bit. :-)


	10. Chapter 10

Well, here it is! The final chapter! Also, if you review, I have some "Deleted Scenes" I'm thinking about putting up. They were originall supposed to be part of the fic, but I couldn't find a place to put them. and they're too short to put up as a chapter alone. I tried to put two of them up earlier in the fic, but they just didn't seem to fit. I'm also thinking about writing some of the other flashback scenes from the previous year's pranks. But I'm not sure. My fancharacter won't leave me alone. (frowns.)

Anyhow, here it is. Hope you enjoy it!

* * *

"But I know he's not here. So just relax for a minute, okay?" Sideswipe said cheerily, hopping up onto one of the tables. Bluestreak timidly sat down on one of the nearby chairs, hoping the CMO had allready passed out drunk in his office for the day. or at least an early afternoon nap. That would leave them about two hours to relax and do nothing.

No such luck. The medbay doors swished open, and a very angry-looking CMO stomped throught them.

"Okay, what did you do now." he demanded.

"I-I thought Prowl told you-" Sideswipe was immediately cut off

"I talked to Prowl allready. So get your aft in gear." he shoved a transformer-sized mop and bucket at the red mech. "I believe we have some cleaning to do. "

Bluestreak started to open his mouth.

"One peep outta you and I'll weld your mouth shut."

"y-y-yessir" Bluestreak stammered. The CMO shot him a deathly glare. Bluestreak shut his mouth and took the other mop and bucket.

fifteen minutes later...

The two mopped in silence for a minute, then Sideswipe gave the snoozing CMO a glance through the open office door, mug of high-grade still in one hand. Then gave Bluestreak a look.

"Don't do it." Bluestreak whispered back.

"What? He'll never know." Sideswipe snuck over to where Ratchet stached his high-grade and slowly eased the cupboard door open...

CLANG! Sideswipe rubbed the back of his head from the floor.

"I knew that paperweight was good for something." Ratchet noted from the office.  
---------------------------  
Later that day, (about 6 in the evening, actually), Optimus was making his rounds around the Arc. Everything had gone smoothly (well, somewhat.) Although Ratchet had knocked Sideswipe close to silly earlier that day, and Bumblebee and Cliffjumper were out on patrol. Sunstreaker had been supremely mad, and swore if anyone came into the washroom he'd rip their arms off and...

Man, could he ever get mad. And Prime noted the yellow twin had recently added a few more profanities to his vocabulary. Thanks to Ratchet, most likely.

Jade was sulking away in a brig cell until 6:30 (that was when she went to spend the night on monitor duty with red alert)

And there was no sign of Jazz. "Probably in his quarters listening to music." Prime thought. He knew Jazz had internal radio recievers. And could listen to music without others hearing it. He wasn't sure if the black-and white was still sulking over getting caught or not. Optimus knew how Jazz prided himself on being the sneakiest of the sneaky. He'd just have to be more carefull from now on.

Prime wondered if everything would just stay so peacefull.

thenhe heard it.

the noise was coming from a few hallways down.

"Clang!"

"Clang!"

"thud"

followed by an ominous giggle.

What on Cybertron?

then he realized, weren't Wheeljack and Wyldkat repainting the end of the adjacent hallway? Prime wondered if he should even dare step foot down that hall. He knew he might regret it if he did. Unfortunately, the leadership side of him firmly commanded him to do so. He took each step carefully as he approached the next hall. Primus only knew what would be waiting for him at the other end.

Hadn't the pranks been ended? well, it was april first. Of course, it could just be laserbeak and ravage trying to infiltrate the Arc again. he wasn't sure which would be worse. For the sake of his sanity he hoped it was the latter of the two. He wasn't sure he could deal with another round of april fools day foolishness. He rounded the corner and froze.

There, covered in paint from boot to helmet on the floor, was a pair of figures trying to untangle themselves from one another.

"Primus help us." he silently prayed.

Then stifled a chuckle at the scene. It was kind of like a bizarre game of twister, only he wasn't quite sure where one bot ended and the other began.

The pile of arms and legs wiggled, trying to untangle themselves from each other.

"oomph get off me!" the female voice demanded

"heh heh, I can't." said the second voice, which was male.

"Whattya mean you cant!"

"The floor's too slippery." Prime recognized the voices. Wylkat and Wheeljack.

"Eh, heh, hang on." Wheeljack's hand must've slipped because Wylkat let out a fiendishly high pitched "Yeoowrr!"

"Oops.. sorry"

They were completely oblivious to their commanding officer standing there watching the scene.

"Here, let **ME** help!" Wylkat reached out and grabbed a can of paint and deposited it upside down over the autobot scientist's head, paint and all.

"Hey-yaaggh"-SPLOOSH!

Optimus straightened, and tried to swallow his laughter at the scene.

"ahem." he said over the racket.

The pile stopped moving, and two faces peered up at him, both covered in orange-gold paint. Wheeljack lifted the front edge of the paint can slightly to see, not even bothering to remove it.

"Uh..heh..Hi Optimus. Uh... " he thought for a second

"What brings you to this part of the Arc?" That was the most ubsurd question Optimus thought he had ever heard. But he tried to block out the image, and just tilted his head to one side, not really sure what to say.

"What happened here, Wheeljack?"

"Uh... the paint got a little slippery. I didn't know it was going to be like soap.. and, well, see, I kinda spilt a little bit and..." Prime held up his hand to silence them, unable to take anymore without laughing.

"I expect you two to get this cleaned up... and yourselves. He gave the two a merry look.

"And I'll ask Grapple and Hoist about the paint." With that, the red-and blue Autobot leader turned and walked away, leaving the two to their... fate.

As he turned the corner, he heard Wyldkat's voice in the background "How long was he standing there"

"I dunno."

Optimus chuckled he walked away.  
-----------  
Meanwhile, outside the arc's main entrance...

"Hey!... Can anyone hear me"

the setting sun reflected the shadow of a black and white figure, who was hanging upside-down from one of the Arc's main boosters by his ankles.

Jazz squiggled hopelessly, the and the cable holding him up creaked uder his weight, but refused to give way.

"He wondered if he kept calling, someone might eventually hear him.

"Hey!-Aaugh"

A gust of wind caught him, sending the figure swaying back and forth, which ended in him being twirled around. The saboteur shut off his optics so he wouldn't have to see the world swirling around him.

I'm gettin' dizzy up here!

Heeeeelp!

no replies, except his own voice, which echoed quite nicely across the completely empty landscape...

In the brig, a certain jet was counting the ceiling tiles in her cell, and contemplating the next year's revenge pranks.

"well, at least Prowl didn't ban April fools Day from the Arc... she grinned at the thought.

Jazz wriggled a bit more, but to no avail. Still no sound. Not a car engine, not even so much as a bleep or a blip.

Except for a few crickets, who chirped happily in the background, completely oblivious to his predicament.

Jazz folded his arms scross his chest and glared at nothing in particular from underneath his visor.

"JADE! just wait till I get my hands on you"

He could have sworn he heard the echo of a faraway giggle. But it could have only been the wind.

Right?

Jade folded her hands behind her head and gave the ceiling a mischevious smile.

"I guess it is true what they say: April fools are fools, allways"

A weary voice echoed down from the darkness around Autobot ship's boosters.

"Great... so how am I gonna get down from here?"...

fin.


End file.
